


Left Behind

by HK44



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:35:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23933899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HK44/pseuds/HK44
Summary: She left him. Abandoned him with ease. Forgot him. He didn’t matter to her. She’d moved on.
Kudos: 7





	Left Behind

“What?”

Allura pursed her lips and eyed Lance quietly. “I will pilot the Blue Lion until we can find Shiro,” she repeated.

He scowled. Didn’t mean to but he stepped into her space, not too close but close enough. “ _Why?_ ”

She sighed and rubbed her face. “The Blue Lion was created to be trusting. To be flexible. In the event that a paladin was injured or missing, she was created in mind that _anyone_ could fly her. Anyone as a _temporary_ replacement.” She rolled her shoulders before crossing her arms. “Paladins are chosen, in a sense. And they can fly any Lion they wish. Any regular person, like me, cannot do that. Except with the Blue Lion.”

She glanced over at Keith. “In Shiro’s absence, Keith will be piloting the Black Lion and you-” She turned back to Lance. “-will pilot the Red Lion. I will pilot Blue.”

Lance relaxed back and crossed his arms. “Why can’t I pilot the Black Lion then?”

“Shiro made this request. It’s _his_ lion,” Allura said. She turned around and began walking towards the hangers. “I say we respect that.”

* * *

Lance did not like Red. Couldn’t stomach her. She was firm and loud and impulsive and always shouting. Too fast for Lance’s comfort. Too wild for him to relax.

Allura, on the other hand, was doing perfectly with Blue. They flew well together. They formed Voltron just as easily. Her aim was perfect, her judgement was spot-on.

Meanwhile Lance was having the worst time trying to get Red to even consider him. Keith had tried to help but Lance was…

Well, Keith was doing better as their leader than Lance had thought he would’ve been and that was a sore spot growing darker, angrier and more and more jealous as time went on.

Black molded into Keith with ease. Blue was just as sprite and energetic with Allura as she’d been with Lance and Red was just a dick.

Constantly, she fought against him. Refused his command. Refused _him_. And where’d they wind up. Crashing into an asteroid for the billionth time while she tried veering left and he tried going right.

It was a miracle they managed to even take down _one_ Galra ship before heading back to the Castle.

“ _Fuck!”_ Lance shouted, throwing his helmet, an ugly, ugly red, at the wall of his hangar.

“Lance, calm down,” Hunk soothed from behind him. “It’s only been a few weeks.” Hunk wrapped his arms around Lance. “Give it time. You’ll both adjust.”

Lance scowled. “Yeah. I’ll give it time,” he hissed, weasling out of Hunk’s grip. “Just like _Keith_ has to give it time to adjust.”

“Don’t do that,” Hunk whispered, grabbing at Lance and trying to still the shaking in his arms. “Stop comparing yourself to him. It’s different. Different-”

“-circumstances, I know,”Lance snapped. refusing to meet Hunk’s eyes. He shook his way out of Hunk’s hold again. “I’m gonna go shower.” He rubbed at his face. “You should- you should make sure Red isn’t damaged from the hit.”

Hunk heaved a quiet sigh but nodded gently and pushed back the sprites of Lance’s bangs to kiss his forehead softly. Lance tried to relax into it. He did. It just didn’t work.

He didn’t head for the showers afterwards.

He walked the same loving line he’d done for months before Shiro up and vanished. Right to Blue.

He needed to _know_.

Luckily no one was there when he entered her space. He eyed her, magnificent and huge. “Blue?”

She didn’t respond. Hadn’t been responding ever since Allura took over.

He swallowed reproachfully and walked closer to her than he’d been doing for the last few weeks. “Blue?”

A nudge, a nod, even a low _growl_. Anything.

Anything to tell him she still cared.

Because here was the thing.

If Blue could have anyone pilot her and pilot her successfully then who was to say that Lance was even her pilot. That Lance was even her paladin.

Who was to say he couldn’t be replaced. Effortlessly. Easily.

Maybe the reason Red fought him was because he _wasn’t_ a paladin. He _wasn’t_ special. He was nothing. Nothing compared to everyone else. Coran, a diplomat. Allura, a princess, a fighter. Pidge, Hunk and Keith were all paladins and so was Shiro.

Lance was…

Nothing.

A blip.

When they found Shiro, and they _would_ , who was to say that they wouldn’t think that Allura was better than Lance. Better with Blue. That she was the real paladin here.

“Blue?” he whispered and she didn’t respond. He swallowed thickly and squeezed his eyes shut. “Blue, am I- am I important? To you?” He fisted his hands. “Do you- do you even _like_ me?”

She didn’t respond.

“Was I even important to you?” he hissed, desperation leeching into his voice. “Did _anything_ about us even matter? Was any of it _real_?”

She didn’t respond. No growl, no nudge, no nothing.

Just silence. Steady and trembling. Almost _screaming_ at him somehow, thundering and invisible.

Blue was honest. Lance _loved_ honesty. Half the reason he couldn’t keep his mouth shut was because he exuded it so harshly. He said what he thought. Filters were hard to process through because lying was such a touchy thing.

And Blue, she didn’t lie. She was honest, truthful.

And if she _wasn’t_ responding now, it was because she didn’t want to spout a lie.

It hurt.

It burned. It raged at him. This feeling of inadequacy leeching at his bones, scraping at his muscles. Weariness, exhausted and overwhelming, shoved on top of him, immediate. Overpowering.

He struggled under it. Struggled to hold back aching sobs and worrying tears. He tucked them low into his chest and stumbled away. Lightheaded-ness was pounding at him. And under it all, in the wake of her silence, he left.

He left her behind him but that was a lie.

She left _him_. Abandoned _him_ with ease. Forgot _him._ He didn’t matter to her. She’d moved on. And that was the funny thing about Lance.

He was always being left behind by those who said they’d _cared_.

**Author's Note:**

> posting from 2020. originally wrote it feb 2017. it was really funny when i turned out to be right


End file.
